What Is Going On With Her?
by jasperohHALEyeah
Summary: Summer between Twilight and New Moon - Jasper has been picking up some unusual feelings from Bella, unbeknown to her....but could they be because of him? What will he do about it? My first ever fic and it's M for lemons and language! AU OOC JxB eventually
1. Confusion

**A/N: This is my first ever fic…ever and I know where I wanna go with it but I don't know if its any good or not! So please review and if you like it…I'll give you some more!!!**

**It's set between Twilight and New Moon and is more canon than AU (they are all vampires apart from Bella and everyhting that happened in Twilight happened apart from one major thing - Bella neevr found out about Jasper's ability) but I guess the opinion would be that it's petty OOC. Oh yeah and i warn ya - it's a lil bit lemony! :)**

**P.S. Big shout and thank you to mystichearts for my opening words and to the girls over on Twilighted chat last night for telling me to go for it!**

JPOV

_Fuck me, Hale, she really wants you…! _I thought to myself - very unsettled by the fact after last night - as I looked around from the TV, having felt suddenly overcome by the waves of unashamed lust, and realised who those waves were rolling languidly off of. The little brunette on the other squishy white sofa from the one I was sprawled on, trying to be subtle about that fact it was me she was watching. Only my vampire enhanced vision allowed me to catch her gaze before her eyes flickered back to her book, but I was sure I caught the flicker of an embarrassedly little smirk. She clearly thought I hadn't noticed her latest little fantasy moment, but after all she only had human eyes to guide her….and clearly Bella knew nothing of my ability.

This bizarre, hidden - or so she thought - dance had been going on for weeks now and I remained none the wiser as to what was behind it. It was flattering yeah but totally baffled me. It had started one night when Edward had gone hunting (or "visiting family in Seattle") with Emmett and Rose, leaving Bella at the house having a "sleepover" with Alice. This is what they had told Charlie I guessed - no way would he let her stay if he thought they would be together! I chuckled internally at the thought of poor, oblivious Charlie and this whole over-protective father shit that he had going on when it came to his virginal only daughter. Ironically, in this house it was her blood not her body that was lusted after - she was theoretically more in danger of losing her life than her innocence - and he knew absolutely nothing about it.

But in reality, after all the shit with James in the spring and the fact that her and Edward were so in love (a fact I knew only too well having felt it all for myself every moment they are here!), we had welcomed her into the family and none of us would want to see her get hurt.

_Well maybe Rose but we all know that's just bitchiness not murderous intent! _

Even I had grown quite….content with her presence, now I had gotten to know her better during those days in the hotel room. I admit her erratic emotions were those of a human teenager and a complex individual, and therefore a little harder to cope with than those of the controlled ancient creatures I was used to, but I could deal for her sake

_and I could chill her out undetected when I couldn't be bothered to deal! _I thought with a satisfied grin

I figured that this might be part of why she liked it so much here - always talking about how safe and happy she felt - but hey I like making people happy. Happy is certainly an easier emotion than this new, and very odd one….

I remembered the first time I felt it from her. Having said goodbye to the hunting party, and to Carlisle and Esme who were off to celebrate their anniversary.

"You have fun now" said Esme with a smile as she hugged us all "but Bella you get some sleep at some point, please!"

"You too! I'm way jealous of this hotel you are going to, it sounds Ahmazing!" Alice had replied excitedly.

They left and then Bella was curled up with Alice watching some chick movie and I found myself at a bit of a loose end for company. I didn't mind I mean its obvious to most I'm no party animal and I did like being near the girls when they were together - their bond had gotten very strong as the summer went on and I felt calmed by the contented love they projected. Not to mention the fact that their over-excited girly crap in reaction to bits of the movies they watched was kinda funny! So I had laid on the opposite couch from them - where I am now - with my headphones in and closed my eyes to the music.

I had felt Bella's lust before, and it was not the most pleasant to endure when you knew the object was your own brother - especially considering the hormonal, first-love strength of the thing. However it was always tinged with something else - frustration and…..resignation. In truth it was driving me crazy despite getting my release from Alice, I could still feel her tension so it hadn't escaped my attention (nor my heightened senses in the next room to Edward's) that clearly he was turning down like, even her most creative of advances and it was affecting her more than I think he realised.

Don't get me wrong he wanted her (I felt his lust all too unwillingly as well) but as much as I love my brother there ain't no denying he is uptight - all worry and morals and self denial. I had heard him - I couldn't help but her him with his "We can't" and "We shouldn't" and "Not yet love" and all the rest of it and rolled my eyes at his self denial. The hope Bella had was still there whenever they retired to his room I could tell but it was fading, almost imperceptibly, all the time and I think she was getting a little bit pissed to be honest - not to mention a big bit impatient - that girl wanted him bad!

This time had been different though.

Edward wasn't even there, nor being mentioned, and the movie was pretty chaste so at first, I thought the arousal was coming from my Alice, thinking about later tonight, but when I looked up to give her a seductive smile, the scene in front of me didn't fit with the mood or my own thoughts and for an instant I was knocked off balance. It was Bella who had hurriedly cast her eyes back to the screen and blushed in the way Edward loved so much. It was cute there was no denying but it made me a little panicky knowing what she had just been feeling, although now embarassment and fear had overshadowed the lustful feelings. Whereas romcom junkie Alice had never been anything but transfixed by whatever sap was happening with Johnny and Baby or whoever the hell it was tonight. Does not compute - I mean if Bella was fantasising over the male lead why was she staring unseen at me before I caught her??? I just shrugged it off as that weird human and her crazy mind and went back to my cd.

But it had kept on happening. Maybe 5 or 6 times now I caught her surge of desire…and now curiosity….caught her looking and been bemused by the whole damn skit. I knew she didn't know I was an empath or she would have run a mile from me these days so I acted normal when we chatted. That was until today….well last night.

Alice was hunting with Edward and it was pretty late by human standards so Bella was in his bed - a big, showy, luxurious thing bought solely for her - and I was next door in my room watching a movie when I heard something only my exceptional ears could hear and at the same moment felt the turned on feeling start to creep in. I was used to this of course, what with 2 other vampire coulples being in the same house and having the hearing that we did, we were all pretty used to this and were decades past the awkwardness. But this was not a familiar sound and my curiosity had gotten the better of me making me pause the movie to see if I would hear it again.

"uhhh"

And there it was, a soft little moan - not Esme since she and Carlisle were still downstairs doing mundane, downstairs type things; and certainly not Rose because damn she was a screamer - so I deduced it had to be Bella. Alone. The realisation of what that implied was….

_Pretty hot _I thought, with a smirk _That boy needs his head checked leaving her in that state AGAIN _……_oh well at least she gets what she needs. Finally._

"mmm" "uhhh"

Shit….it was starting to turn me on, I could fell myself getting hard just listening to the effects of her shy little self-exploration…..she made some pretty hot little sex noises and I'm nothing if not a red blooded young guy (well not literally anymore but you get the idea).

"ohh!"

That one was a little louder….damn it was naughty but I couldn't stop myself from listening now…..I undid my zipper and put my hand down my tight boxers to stroke my, now very hard, cock; laying back and closing my eyes. I wasn't really thinking of Bella or even Alice, but just getting lost in those cute little moans and the feeling of pleasure seeping through the wall…..

"mmmm" "mmmMMM"

They were getting more impatient and closer together…she was close and aww hell so was I! I stroked faster up and down the length of my shaft - I could even hear her breath catching now - and I could feel myself tensing up…

"oh yes……JASPER!"

My hand had literally frozen in its tracks and my eyes flew open.

"uh…ohhhh……ahhhhhhhhhh!"

I heard her come and only dully registered how ridiculously hot it sounded - _SOME day Edward is gonna be pretty darn lucky -_ in the back of my head because right then up until right now after the latest round of Bella's secret watching me game the front of my head had only one thought _What the FUCK is going on with her????"_

**Reviews are like Jasper in his shades with his hair all messed up…….. ;)**


	2. Curiosity Killed The Cat

**A/N: Thanks sooooo much for the great reviews on chapter one everyone - I did not expect such a good reaction for my first fic! Also I will try my hardest to not make so many spelling/grammar mistakes. I was on such a roll with my idea that it was done in one go and so things like that got put to the back of my head :)**

**Anyway here is chapter two for y'all that were keen for more! Turns out I was pretty keen too I know it has only been two days but the muse is with me or something! It is Bella's pov this time but don't worry Mr Hale will return soon! It's M for more language and lemons (I am naughty aren't I?)**

**Also I should have said this before but I don't own Twilight (or Jasper's sexy ass unfortunately!)**

**BPOV**

I didn't know how much more of this I could stand. The realisation (and along with it the fear) was creeping in around the edges of my mind telling me that Edward was never going to change his mind about the sex thing, nor was he going to change me into one of them. Basically he was creating a perfect circle of safety which prevented us from _ever _doing it. This left me feeling far from satisfied on many levels. Not to mention confused as to why he would want this restriction in place. I mean he might have been a 17 year old guy for a long time but still that's what he is and he supposedly loves me so….why doesn't he want me?

I knew I wasn't exactly a supermodel but he was always telling how beautiful he thought I was….and I had felt him get hard every time we kissed and it got intense. I had tried talking him round but even as I did I knew it was pointless.

"Edward why can't you just try? I feel like you don't really want to…" I had pleaded just last week, after he had pulled away as soon as I could feel his erection against my leg, and it turned into yet another disagreement on the subject.

"We have been over this so many times love, I just can't risk hurting you - I could never forgive myself!" he had answered as if he was explaining something to a child, "and besides I don't feel it's proper"

"Edward I know it's hard for you to see it differently but this is the 21st century and it is perfectly _proper_! We love each other it's not like it's some sleazy one night stand you are talking about it's just us…." I had tailed off then, the resignation washing over me as usual.

"Bella, my love, please do not be sad….it's late anyway so even if we could, we shouldn't" he smiled with a air of something that looked suspiciously like triumph, as if he had me beaten or something. I wasn't even particularly tired but he was going hunting with Carlisle and I supposed I should at least pretend that I would sleep while he was gone. He had kissed my forehead then as if everything was fine again and was gone before he could even see how sad my smile probably was.

It was yet another warm summer night and I was only getting more frustrated laying in his big fancy bed (which I knew was just for my sake and this made me a little uncomfortable, what with its obviously expensive style) and getting no closer to sleep. I vaguely registered that fact I was still pretty worked up from earlier with no hope of any release in that respect either. I got up and wandered over to the open window gazing out into the trees. There was a huge solid branch that I knew was flattish and strong from Alice and Edward both walking along it so frequently, running right near the window. I remembered how I had been nervous about stepping out on to it but I really wanted to sit in the tree and ponder my problem! I got to the part that looked best for sitting and sat down - it wasn't really that high up when I looked down.

After a moment I realised the major problem: I had zero experience in this kind of situation. Sure I had gone on a few dates, kissed some guys back in Pheonix, even been "felt up" by one of them, but this was virgin territory for me. Literally.

_It is for him too _I thought to myself. _H_ow_ is either one of us supposed to move things forward if we have no clue how?_

Because I was getting to the stage where trying to convince him with words was not helping at all, but I just couldn't get my head around trying to "seduce" him physically. I wouldn't know where to start with something so evident of self-confidence. I would feel so…not me doing all that sexy, manipulative crap! My thoughts had been interrupted then by a noise coming from the next window - Jasper and Alice's room - where the billowing of Ali's fancy lace drapes indicated that their window was open too. I knew this noise. I had heard it a few times before when I was in Edward's room but usually I just ignored it by going somewhere else in the house or putting on music. But this time I was trapped there on the branch - their room between myself and the window I needed to climb back in!

"oh FUCK!" in Alice's sweet little voice floated towards me through the night and my heart started racing

_In panic or anticipation _came a sly voice from the back of my head, who was clearly still hot from Edward, as I realised that I couldn't go back past their window or they would surely notice me, and so short of sticking my fingers in my ears I would have to stay here and listen til they were done! And still the moaning and swearing and erratic (and also unnecessary in their case) breathing continued and suddenly I realised I was leaning toward the sound….and something was starting to ache a little between my thighs….

_What the hell am I doing? They are practically your siblings and you are perving on them having sex??? _I admonished myself but I couldn't deny that it sounded so….good that I couldn't help it. I had seen the odd overdramatic sex scene in movies and my mom had given me this mortifying book on sex when I was 10 but apart from that, nothing. I was totally curious, and totally turned on, so I did something crazy but almost instinctual, and edged along the branch towards their window until I could just see a slice of their room at an angle from where I sat.

Obviously thinking the noise was just an animal or whatever, they were not distracted from their fun because what I saw sent a jolt of heat from my eyes right down to my core. Alice was laid on her back across their big, equally fancy bed with just a poufy little yellow skirt and a white lacy bra on, the skirt pushed up around her hips, with one hand resting on her stomach and the other above her head grabbing the perfect white bedcover. Jasper was on his knees on the floor at the edge of the bed in just his jeans, his hands on her inner thighs holding them apart and his face, it seemed, buried between them. He had his back to me and she had her eyes closed in pure pleasure so I went unseen as I stared open mouthed at the incredibly erotic scene before me. I was transfixed, not only by how sexy I found Jasper's strong looking back and long, muscular arms but also by the increasingly frantic Alice whose moaning was getting louder and more impatient. It wasn't as if I found her attractive - of course she was beautiful but that wasn't it - I had just never seen someone for real in such a state of arousal and it was making me wet I was so turned on. Just as I was thinking about this…

"Fuuuuuuuuck…….uuuuhhhhhhhh" Alice screamed as her back arched off the bed and I knew she had just come. She was far from done though because then I heard

"You want me to fuck you, baby?" in the slow southern drawl that I had never heard sound so sexy before

"God yes, I want it bad…" Alice giggled

So I watched still as Jasper got to his feet - and it seemed the bed was the perfect height for this (I guessed that was deliberate) because he undid his jeans and stepped out of them. He wasn't wearing any underwear and although his back was still to me I guessed he must've slid himself inside her, because the noise she made was one of satisfaction like nothing else I had heard. Just like that he started fucking her - no hesitation, I noted with a twinge of jealousy, just sex - and she was definitely pleased about the fact! I don't know how long I was there gazing at them while the ache between my thighs grew, squeezing them together to try and relieve it but to no avail. I could see him holding on to her left leg, apparently totally in his element taking control, while her right leg hung over the end of the bed by his hip. Then I noticed him move his free left hand in front of his body and her moaning suddenly intensified

"oh yeah right there…you're gonna make me come baby!" she breathed and I figured he must be touching her clit while he fucked her now

"yeah come for me darlin…that's it" he almost growled and she almost immediately did, even more violently than before it seemed; and then it sounded like he let go just after

"Alice….oh FUCK!" and he collapsed down on top of her with his arms either side of her body. While they were kissing I realised it was now or never and scrambled back to Edward's window, climbed awkwardly back through the window. I flopped down on the bed and wiped the sweat that I hadn't noticed was there off my forehead with the back of my hand.

_Wow that was like….totally hot! _I admitted to myself and I remembered how urgently I had felt the need for release watching them. I licked my finger and slid my hand down my sweats and my panties in one go finding my clit hot and swollen…I rubbed it gently but quickly and came not more than a minute or two later, biting my lip and shaking with trying to be as silent as I could. I figured I fell asleep exhausted because the next thing I remember it was morning and Edward was waking me with his cool hand on my cheek.

"I think someone had a bit of a naughty dream last night - I can smell how excited you've gotten" he said softly and I could hear the smile in his voice. I blushed furiously as the events of the previous night came back to me

"Maybe I did" I lied, "but I can't really remember"

"What a shame" he said as I looked up to see him doing his devastating sexy face and I had been annoyed at him for implying what? That I could tell him all about it and then we could like…act it out? More like I could tell him and we would get all worked up and then do nothing as usual! I had mumbled some kind of half hearted agreement and gone to shower, but I walked right into Jasper's hard and…._wow incredibly sexy _chest in the hallway.

"Mornin Bella" he said brightly and then something imperceptible shifted in his soft gold eyes and looked at me really weird while I started gabbling out a reply

"Um…morning Jasper, did you sleep well? No I mean did you have a good night? Oh…um….never mind I'm rambling - gotta go shower….see you later!" As i turned and stumbled off down the hall

"See ya Bells!" I heard him mumble somewhere behind me and my cheeks bright red as his voice sent the sound of him when he came sweeping through my head....

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I figured I would just forget about that night - and morning - but I just couldn't. It had started me thinking about how Alice was always trying to tell me stories about Jasper and her and what they got up to until I waved her away, embarrassed. About how much pleasure he clearly gave her….I had seen the effects of his obvious skill with my own eyes. About how i had discovered how much I found him attractive! I mean I never thought he was unattractive it was just he was "Alice's" and Edward was like my obsession, plus Jasper had taken a while to open up so I had seen him, but never really looked at him. The way his messy blonde hair fell in his eyes and he would rake it back with a big strong hand, the way he smiled like he had just thought of something dirty, the way his quiet voice and accent made every word sound just a bit sexier and deeper than the rest of us, the way he would wear long sleeved shirts but roll them up, which I perosnally thought made his forearms look divine

_The way his hands gripped her thighs_

I was catching myself thinking things like this all the time when I saw him around the house and I was appalled to say that every time I did, this flash of pure lust would run through me and then he would always look up and catch me watching him.

_God I wish I didn't blush so damn much - he's gonna start thinking I'm crazy going red for no reason!_

Every time I would feel guilty and think of Edward (thank the Lord he couldn't read these thoughts) and remind myself he was my boyfriend, but there was clearly something very different in what I felt for him and what I was starting to feel for Jasper. Edward was beautiful, elegant like a perfect statue of a man and I loved him so much but Jasper? When I saw him now - in this state of constant frustration - I saw pure sex, his movements were slower, more deliberate, his attitude more relaxed and his sexuality right out there for me to see

_And for me to want a piece of since you're sure as hell not getting any from Edward!_

Although my "bad" voice was annoying this fact was true - I was horny and I was 0% closer to my goal, and having Jasper around giving me flashbacks to images of exactly what I wasn't getting was NOT helping. The thought was almost fully formed in my head that maybe I needed someone like him to "teach me the ways of love" as it were….but sadly _those_ kinds of imaginings about him had only been leading to more "naughty dreams" when Edward was away. Well at least, that's what it smells like to Edward…and I let him think it because it just wouldn't be "proper" if he thought I was touching myself would it?

_Especially not when you're thinking of his brother...._

_**Reviews are like Jasper talking dirty in that accent of his!**_


	3. Lost in Thought

**A/N: Thanks again to everyone who has been furiously adding my fic to alerts and stuff it has made me really happy to see the response to my work! I have even made new friends from far away lol (p.s. I LOVE twilighted chat - everyone there is awesome!!)**

**Anyhoo this is ch3 of my story and we are back with Jasper (lucky us :P) but I will be taking a break for a week or so to study for some exams at uni - maybe Monday or Tuesday next week I will have ch4.….you will all just have to wait hehe!!**

**JPOV**

_She's really getting to you isn't she? _thought the voice of *Bad Jasper* - the one who had all the ideas when it came to sex…or violence. I shuddered at the thought of my days back the South and tried to push it from my head - or at least to the back of it. But on this issue - it would appear he was right. Bella and her new desire for yours truly had me intrigued. I had gone from confused to angry to freaked out and now I was just plain curious. They say it killed the cat but I think I have more "lives" in me than one of those critters!

I had decided that the only way I was ever gonna find out what the deal was, was if I asked Bella herself - Edward couldn't read her thoughts and Alice was no use since you don't decide to consciously lust after someone and this made Bella's state of mind undetectable to the visions. Hmm. Ask the shyest, least likely to want a fuss, most private person I have ever met why they have been secretly masturbating over you. Not my idea of a good time so for now I was in limbo.

Because I _am_ susceptible to Edward and Alice - this house's equivalent of the thought police. If I decide to go ask her Alice will know my intentions and stop me, demanding to know what the hell was going on. And if I got past her and had the conversation with Bella, Edward would see the memory of it in my head and be PISSED.

Hell I was meant to be the quiet, smart one and this had even me stumped.

For now…..because I _was_ going to get to the bottom of it. I had no intention of being watched by this girl until the end of time (that is if Edward ever gets the balls to change her) without knowing what her problem was. Maybe I could help her or something.

I had a theory that maybe if I just happened to mention it while I was talking to her then it would slip by Alice, but Edward? I was gonna have to take my chances and claim the encounter had been a dream if pressed by him - because my opportunity was here! Carlisle, Esme and Edward were going north to visit the Denali's - their friend clan from before - and Alice and Rose were having a girl's night out in the clubs in Seattle. They did this very rarely so who was I to deny them for my own sake? I didn't exactly relish 12 hours of XBOX shit with Emmett so we had sort of volunteered, in an unspoken way, to keep Bella company while she stayed here, where she preferred to be. It would be nothing to sneak away from Emmett and his dumb, noisy games to talk to her.

_No stop planning! Alice is just over there…._ I warned myself and started thinking the words on the page of the book I was meant to be reading instead. Alice gave a funny look then came over and kissed my hair before floating upstairs, probably to attack her wardrobe for tonight I guessed.

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"Don't wait up boys" called Rose from the hallway "enjoy being thoroughly boring!"

"We will!" I answered her jokingly while Emmett just laughed from the sofa where he was lying, having started his game-a-thon _already_.

"Night Bella," said Alice in a more caring voice than Rose had been using, "Don't let them bug you too much - you have my cell number if they need putting in check"

I rolled my eyes and Emmett started laughing even harder, stopping asap when alice appeared behind the sofa and punched his arm

"Ow! You are just plain scary for a little thing!" and with that the girls were gone in a cloud of perfume and excitement. The house was silent apart from bangs and shouts from the game on the TV. After a while, I wasn't sure how long, I could see her eyes on me in my periphery and the hot wave of lust washing over me again. Then suddenly she announced

"Well I'm going to bed guys - where it's _quiet_" she stuck her tongue out at Emmett.

"Night Bells, but you're missing out not seeing me complete this game in record time…."

"Ooh hold me back!" she muttered sarcastically and I had to laugh. Emmett getting mocked by anyone was funny. She looked at me with an expression I couldn't figure out before it was gone with her as she turned to head upstairs. Her hair caught the moonlight coming through the glass wall and shone blue black in the night. I noticed I was smiling to myself. I coughed in case Emmett was watching me but of course he was still killing computer sprites.

After what I felt was a reasonable pause, but not too long that she would be asleep, I murmured something about going to watch a movie since he was hogging the TV to Emmett and started to climb the stairs, at an almost human pace to steady my nerves.

_Why am I nervous? It's not me who's been acting weird._

And then all too fast I was outside Edward's door, took a deep but pointless breath and knocked. I felt a stab of fear and reluctance from inside the room but I heard Bella try to act natural when she called

"Who is it?"

"It's Jasper, I hope I'm not disturbing you" I replied softly, mentally kicking myself for the too-high level of innuendo in my voice.

"No it's ok you can come in" she said with panic radiating from every pore.

I pushed the door open gently and Bella was sitting up in bed, but with the covers pulled up around her chest, and her arms hugging her knees on top of the blankets - they looked almost silver in the semi-darkness.

"Hey" I said trying to be casual.

"Um…hey" she replied and I could almost _see_ her mind going 100 miles an hour trying to figure out what the hell I was up to.

_Good question _*Bad Jasper* laughed at me….traitor.

I sat on the bed and awkwardly sort of half turned my body towards her. She was looking at me like she was waiting to hear my excuse for my presence. I resisted the urge to mess with her anxiety - I needed to feel her as herself if I was gonna find out anything.

"So Bella I was wondering if Edward had ever told you about my…ability?" I said, deciding just to throw myself out there.

"No I didn't now you had one, why? What is it?" she asked with a blank expression

"I'm an empath. I can feel people's feelings when they are nearby and I can influence them too, although I try not too" I added this so as not to scare her into thinking I was messing with her all the time. Even though I kinda was. She looked like she was mulling things over and then the shock started to creep in, and the dread. She looked up into my face, her black eyes wide with horror and…..realisation. I could hear her heart thudding too fast just a few feet away….

"You can _feel _what people are feeling? What _everything_?" She near enough whispered. I nodded and she dropped my gaze, blushing so red I could tell even in this light. I tried to touch her warm, pale arm to tell her it was ok but she flinched and looked up again from under her eyelashes at my touch.

"Why aren't you angry with me? Or disgusted even?" she implored. I shrugged trying to find the words to explain.

"Because I guess I just don't understand. I'm not like Edward - all I get is feelings but nothing more - I don't get to hear the reasons why! Why me? Why all of a sudden? Plus I guess….I was a bit…flattered…" I tailed off - my turn to be embarrassed. Bella made a little disbelieving snort through her nose

"Yeah right, like guys are bothered by any attention they get from me" she said very quietly as if only to herself. I put a finger under her chin and lifted her face and I think both of us felt the shiver that ran between us, where my cool finger touched her soft warm throat. Her lips parted in surprise and I tried to remember what I was gonna say

"Look you know that's not true, Edward loves you and that Jacob and Mike at school have it pretty bad for you too if what I read from people is true - and it is by the way!" I smiled at her thinking I might have fixed her but she pulled her face away from my hand and I saw the single tear roll down her cheek and into the bedcovers, as anger and frustration came to the surface of her emotions.

"Bella what's wrong?" I pleaded, I hated people feeling this sad.

"I'm not telling you it's pathetic!" she wailed into her legs as she buried her face in her arms.

"Aw please tell me darlin….I can't help you if you don't tell me" I coaxed - I had resorted to turning on the charm in my desperation to know the truth. Something nice but too fast for me to read flickered through her at my words, and her crying definitely lessened.

"Well….ok but you can't say anything to anyone!" she begged and I smiled again

"Of course not"

"Well it's just….Edward. He won't….ever….and I can't talk him round and I think he doesn't want me but he says he does and I don't get it and then……" she hesitated and glanced up at me again, before taking a deep breath and blurting out, "Then the other week I saw you and Alice together - I didn't mean to I was trapped on the branch in a bad mood - and I was so….jealous and like….fascinated or something and it got me pretty hot - sorry, I know that's weird - and now when I look at you it reminds of that and what I can't have from him and it just drives me crazy! Why can't he be like that?? Why can't I have….that" she flopped her face down again so her forehead was back on her arms and sighed with relief.

I sat there for what I thought was just a few seconds as I realised the night she meant - when I vaguely noted a noise outside a bit louder than any animal I was used to hearing but had brushed it off. Turns out it was a little virgin voyeur instead…._that is sexy as hell _I caught myself thinking, but then Bella broke the silence and whined

"Say something! You hate me don't you?!"

"No! Of course not I'm just….trying to get this straight. So you want….sex and Edward won't do it and now I make you think of sex because you saw me and Alice doing it….?"

"It sounds dumb when you say it like that but she is always trying to tell me how good it is with you and I try to tune her out but it must be getting through after all…..I want to feel what she does!" she mumbled, and I nodded to myself, now understanding what it had meant when she called my name that time….

"I'm sure he will see sense someday Bella." I soothed and I couldn't help but send her a wave of peace and calm. She looked at me questioningly

"Yes that was me….I just wanted to make you feel better" I explained "you will get what you want." she snapped her head up to look at me and searched my eyes for a while with a surge of hope, before seeming….like she had given up trying to look for what she was looking for.

"Thanks Jasper, I guess I should sleep now" she said rather firmly as if asking me to go. I was a bit puzzled by the sudden change in atmosphere, and wanted so much for it to be calm again so I daringly leaned over and kissed her forehead, getting blasted with her desire once again and treated to her flushed cheeks darkening in the shadows.

"Goodnight darlin" I said with a smile as her lust subsided and was replaced with…excitement?

"Night Jasper" she mumbled from her tangle of sheets as she turned her back to me. I closed the door and had barely got to my room when I felt the ache start up anew…..she was touching herself again?? But this time when she came, saying my name and not Edwards, I felt weirdly smug

_Damn…..*Bad Jasper* has some goooood ideas _I thought in the hazy glow of my orgasm…..

**Reviews are like Jasper showing up in your room in the middle of the night…….**


	4. Desire

**A/N: Ok people so chapter 3 never got many reviews, so I'm sorta worrying that you were not into it?? But I love this story right now so I am pressing on anyway! Thanks to the AWSUM mystichearts for saying such great things about my Jasper and for loving ch3, thus keeping my faith in it. This fic would not exist if not for her opener or her encouragement so I hope this mention makes her feel special!!!! Oh and you should so read her fic Forever Lost In You it's so good!**

**Again I don't own Twilight or Jasper and yet here we are, back with his POV again (I am really spoiling you…) it's short and sweet to tease you ;) **

**JPOV**

_Ever since that night. Since she was sat there looking up at me all hopeful and vulnerable with those big liquid black eyes. Since I touched her and felt her shiver. Since she told me that basically I make her hornier than she already is. I have just wanted to pin her down and give her exactly what she wants….._

_Don't even bother….. _I informed my conscience as it reeled in shock from the admission I had only just made to myself. I was well aware that I was taken, and she was taken plus she was pretty innocent (whereas I certainly wasn't) and everything about it was just plain wrong but….that was kinda why I was so into it!

I'm a guy. Not a repressed pain in the ass like Edward either. I'm a cowboy damnit! I laughed at that thought - I didn't often stereotype myself in that way, since it was a long time since I had been anywhere near *cowboy-country* - but it was sorta true. And an undeniably hot girl…

_Make that virgin….. _I heard lurking around my head and had to shake myself, but couldn't decide if it was because of how bad that made me sound, or how hot it made me feel….

…Anyway a hot _virgin_ had just told me she was frustrated and liked watching me fuck Alice and basically begged me with her eyes to help. I had figured that was what her weird look she gave me was, just before I left her room, she was trying to get me to help her. But what can I do? Talk to Edward? Like that would make a difference - if she can't get through to him when she's half naked and asking for it then what the hell use am I? Get Alice to talk to her, teach her a few tricks?

_And that little girl has got TRICKS…..*_Bad Jasper* was having too much fun today.

But no that wasn't going to get past Edward's stoic resolve not to touch her. I could feel his determination, his guilt - he was definitely not gonna crack any time soon and to be honest, Bella's frustrations were driving me INSANE. I felt every little jolt of pleasure he gave her, I felt her aching need to have him, the resentment when she went another night unfulfilled. But I also felt the apprehension quickly followed by her relief (which was often accompanied by her sweet little moans) on night when he was hunting. Lucky for me and *Bad Jazz* that he and Alice were so close they often chose to hunt together, like they were planning on doing tonight.

I hunted alone since it gave me time to think and be…..a bit wild and stuff that I didn't think Alice would wanna see. The hunting arrangements meant I often found myself coming with Bella, but not actually _with _her and even after that, it was often not enough to satisfy the hunger she always felt.

So I always felt it too.

And let's face it, at school all those humans are just…vacuous, and at home Alice spends a lot of time either alone or with Rose getting pampered or whatever and well, for all intents and purposes Esme is my Mother so all this extra lust had to go somewhere…..

Bella. I was spending a lot of time studying her these days. It started out that I was watching in wonder as she went on as normal, pretending she had never revealed her secret, and I thought maybe I had dreamt it. Then one day Emmett made a comment in a conversation I wasn't really tuned in to about "no secrets in this house", and I just happened to catch her eye as I looked up at the sound of the laughter which followed. She had looked down and blushed, but from behind her hair she gave me the sexiest, shy little smile I think I have ever seen - I knew she had told me all that stuff for real….and the effect of that knowledge went right to my pants.

After that I was watching her just for fun. Her slow senses would never notice but I was checking her out whenever I thought I could get away with it. I had noticed that she only used that smile for me. I had noticed that if she arched her back and threw her head back - she did this when she yawned and I could watch it all day - her wavy, dark chocolate hair touched her ass. I had noticed that she often licked her lips if she was thinking before she spoke…and that those lips would look amazing parted in a gasp of pleasure. Speaking of which I had also noticed - and felt like I could pick it out of a list - the same shocked little wail every time she came….

_God I'd love to make her make that noise….._

It's true. The fantasies I had been having at the moment were definitely featuring her more and more. _The things I could teach her to do with those gorgeous lips….. an innocent little girl just dying to be taken…. bet I could make her scream for me…. I know that's what she really wants you saw it her eyes….. Those big black eyes looking up at me while I fuck her……_

_Wait. Go back a thought. Saw it in her eyes? _That night……when I reassured her that she would get what she wants, and she rifled through my eyes with hers…..she was looking for something - could that really be it? If my face could be drained of colour it would have been right then. He might be frustrating her but it's me she has been perving on…..that little scene she witnessed has got her all jealous and now…..

_It's you she wants…..she needs a real man to relieve that tension._

Could I really just…..break her in…..? Our little secret? Would Edward believe me that it was a dirty dream? Would Alice see it at all? I was snapped out of my introversion by that voice,

"Well, goodnight everyone" Bella announced sweetly, giving me that smile and it occurred to me there was only one way I would find the answers to my questions

_Go get her cowboy_ I rolled my eyes and then watched her walk upstairs…..

**The more you guys review, the faster you (and Bella) will get what you want!!!!**


	5. Can You Resist Temptation?

**A/N: Sorry this update has taken me ages - I wasn't doing it on purpose but my chest infection got a lot worse and I was basically asleep and/or coughing for 3 days when I had planned on writing, THEN I had 2 exams at uni just as I was feeling better! Poor me and poor you not getting your next fix of this lol!**

**Anyway here it is and I am switching back to Bella during the chapter (p.s. I would love some reviews on how I handle her POV both here and in ch2 as nobody has mentioned it yet and I'm curious)**

**This is a bit longer than usual but I promise it's a lemon torte with ice cream (which they serve in my work and is TASTY hehehe) and I own nothing! Enjoy!**

**JPOV**

"I am feeling so on edge - come on Em, we are going hunting too….you wanna come Jazz?" I heard Rosalie's irritated tones dragging me back to reality.

"Nahh, I hunted today while you girls were shopping, plus someone should stay here in case Bella wakes up and freaks out that the house is empty." I tried to keep my tone light, feeling as thought everyone could see a big neon sign above me that said *THINKING ABOUT DOING BELLA* in flashing letters.

"More like you know you'll lose the bear stalking contest HA!" Emmett laughed while Rosalie rolled her eyes and pulled him towards the door

"Later!" she called and they left, but I could hear them teasing each other until they were out of range. I let out the breath I realised I had been holding and thought about what I had said. I was alone with Bella. Esme and Carlisle had announced around 9pm that they were going for a "romantic moonlit walk for the night" which we all knew was polite code for "an alfresco sex marathon" which they seemed to love so much. And now Rose had decided that her and Emmett should go do something similar (I was not so gullible as to their claims about going hunting). So here we were, just me and Bella in the big house.

I focused my concentration and felt tentative tendrils of arousal creeping around my body from the stairwell and I felt myself getting hard thinking about Bella thinking about me….

Before I even acknowledged the idea I was outside Edward's room, my hand reaching for the doorknob…..

**BPOV**

I closed my eyes and bit my lip.…it felt so good those fingers trailing up and down over my panties….I could feel myself getting wet, hell I was already wet from Edward's kiss before he left….

_and from watching Jasper running those hands through his hair all evening, lost in thought_….that little voice reminded me

Mmm that sexy, messy hair….I would love to wind my fingers through it….oh good it's here

I froze in my all my actions at once, touching, thinking, breathing as my mind caught up to my eyes and clicked that Jasper was in my room leaning against the inside of the door and had probably seen what I was doing. But he had this really sexy slow smile, and his eyes were soft in this light. Maybe he didn't notice.

"Jasper, you scared me! I was sleeping" I lied as I tried to shuffle myself around to look more like this might be true.

"Bella you don't have to pretend - empath remember?" he pushed off the door and walked towards the bed "To be honest I was quite enjoying the show, although now I am just as frustrated as you thanks to my little gift"

He sat down on the bed and leaned his elbows on his thighs and his chin in his hands, turning to face me "So Edward leave you hangin again I take it?"

"I….I….what do you think I….what…how…..huh?!" I managed to gabble out while Jasper did his impression of my new best friend who knows everything about everything. He straightened up and tilted his to the side

"Bella, here is the thing - I'm a vampire and an empath. I can smell how turned on you are. I can hear your heart racing. I felt your unresolved tension, your lust, your arousal then your shock and now guilt and confusion. You were touching yourself." He stated. It wasn't a question. I sat up in the bed, jammed my arms crossed on top of my raised knees and glared down at them

"Fine! Maybe I was - so what?! Haven't you sensed me before and ignored it?! I thought it was normal plus what else am I meant to do?!" I snapped at him, looking up and realised he was smiling that damned sexy smile again….my breath caught a little, and I started to register the heat between my legs again.

"Yeah I have heard you before," he leaned over and gently took hold of my forearms and unfolded them, shuffling up the bed towards me. He lowered them to the sides of my legs and held them there, then looked me right in the eyes, still smiling, "I have heard you whispering my name darlin…." he stayed completely still and continued to stare. I blushed scarlet thinking of our last midnight conversation and tried to wriggle out of his grip but he was scarily strong

_oh yeah another vampire!_ I huffed and glared off to the side away from his gaze and felt a cold hand leave my left wrist and touch my left cheek instead, turning my head back to him.

"Hey don't worry it's your secret I get it…..you wanna know mine?" he grinned conspiratorially and I just frowned a little to imply that he should tell me - I still hadn't found my voice. He leaned forward to my ear, his fingers still holding my chin at the other side and his cheek just brushing mine, sending shivers along every inch of my skin and drawled in that accent of his,

"I think it's so fucking hot it drives me crazy…" I gasped a little and felt his words hit me right in my centre as he drew back to look at me again. "I know what you want Bella, what you fantasise about when you are in here touching yourself…..like tonight. What were you thinking when I came in?"

I mouthed soundlessly at him then swallowed hard and whispered "You."

"What about me Bella? Come on…." he leaned in again and giving me another shiver and whispered this time, echoing his words that night, "I can't help you if you don't tell me…" and then very carefully he placed a kiss just under my ear.

_Oh my god I thought this is a dream, this can't be happening….OH SHIT what about Edward?!_

As if he sensed my panic, which I guess he did, he pulled back and chuckled "Hey relax, I can block Edward out no problem….I have been for weeks after listening to you all those nights, getting all your frustration….and those mental images of you…." he trailed off stroking his hands up and down my arms and it was blurring my guilty thoughts. I could smell his sweet vampire scent from the man I had lusted after so much…..I bit my lip and closed my eyes as I thought about him touching Alice like this and what I had seen that night.

I felt him shift and opened my eyes to see him coming closer, his hair was falling in his big amber eyes and he reached up to slide his cool hand into my hair. The feeling of his fingertips on my scalp raised goosebumps on my arms and I tensed. He looked intently at me, losing his smile for a second,

"Don't be scared darlin, I know I won't hurt you," again he brushed his lips against my ear, "unless you want it that is…." I shuddered and suddenly he was kissing me, his cold lips were gentle but confident on mine and he had tangled his other hand in my hair as well holding my face where it was but I found I wasn't trying to pull away. I snaked my hands around the outside of his shoulders and dug my nails into him, a result of the sudden ache that was growing inside me….

_this is the *real man* I needed to teach me!_ was perhaps the last coherent thought I had as he broke our kiss and whipped the duvet away from my body, looking at me with pure lust that I had never seen from Edward, and grabbed my waist, pulling me down on to my back again. He grabbed my hands and pinned them above my head as he ran his other hand up my side, brushed over my breasts and made me arch towards him as my nipples hardened under his touch. i was a little scared of him, his strength and his fervour considering the vampire in him; but his dominance was making me weak with desire. He continued on down my stomach and teasingly avoided the place I wanted him to touch the most, to stroke his hand right down the outside of my leg.

"God Bella you really are beautiful….such a sexy little girl" he said playfully and I liked how it had sounded so I giggled, deciding to play this game,

"Oh little girl huh?" I said shyly

"Uh huh…just a naughty little girl who has got me so fucking hot that I just can't control myself any longer…." he almost growled and quickly moved on top of me, nudging my legs apart with his knee and settling himself between them, while still grasping my wrists in his hand, and supporting himself on his arm. He kissed me again, more urgently and moaned against my mouth. I felt his hardness pressing against exactly the right spot and moaned even louder. he released my hands and I actually missed the feeling. His hands were all over me and it felt so good I barely noticed he was trying to take my tshirt off. He pulled up onto his knees as I raised my arms above my head to help and he threw it across the room, quickly followed by his own, before laying down again. I hissed through my teeth when his cool skin pressed against my hot, hard nipples and ground my hips up into him. I had lost all my panic, all my shame and all I could think and feel was the need for release. I reached up and wound my fingers in that messy blonde hair as he started kissing down my neck, along my collarbone, down my chest and began sucking my nipple.

"mmmm that's so good" I breathed "mmm" I felt his fingers start rolling and rubbing the other one and grabbed at his hair which made him breathe in sharply through his nose.

He left my nipples and started kissing down my stomach, achingly slowly, while I spread my legs a little wider in anticipation. His fingers hooked in the top of my panties and began slipping them down my thighs, before yanking them roughly off my left foot and tossing them on the pile. He stopped still for a second to look at me, and I felt a little self conscious to be completely naked so I bit my lip

"So innocent….but that is damn sexy!" he said his voice full of desire and he placed his hands on my inner thighs just above my knees, sliding them upwards and pushing them apart as he went. He leaned down and I closed my eyes.

"uuuuhhhh" I moaned at the long awaited attention to my centre as he ran his tongue from my opening right up to my clit and started flicking and lapping at it. He gripped my legs just as I had thought of him doing and his tongue kept up its relentless pace, building the tingling ache inside me. I was bucking my hips up but he had a firm hold on my thighs, and that just sent another jolt of fire through my core. He seemed to know what I needed thought and licked one cool finger before sliding it into my aching heat. My eyes rolled back with this new amazing sensation, his finger being bigger and more talented than my own. He pumped it in and out a few times and then slid another one in with it. I could feel my body having to adjust to it this time.

"So tight….this uncharted little pussy" he said to himself more than me and attacked my clit with his tongue again while sliding those fingers in and out, getting faster as I moaned and mewled and writhed more. The pressure was coiling tighter and tighter in the pit of my belly and I could feel the rush of it in my pelvis…

"Oh fuck, Jasper, I'm gonna……ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh" I screamed as I came harder than I ever had on his hand. When I came down he drew his fingers out of me and moved back up my body until he was on top of me again and smiled at me like he had just won a prize….I smiled dazedly back up at him and he shook his head a little

"I ain't finished with you yet Bella…" he started unzipping his jeans and stood up to take them off, along with his boxers, revealing his erection fully. I stared at it in the moonlight as he got in between my legs again.

_Oh my god that is huge, it's gonna hurt so bad_ I panicked

"Hey don't worry darlin I will be careful….just relax" he said softly into my ear as he kissed my neck again - I really did like that - and I settled a bit as he positioned himself at my entrance, running his head up and down getting it wet. He looked up with the hottest look on his face and said,

"Damn girl you don't know how bad I've wanted you" with such fierce lust I had to have him and was consumed by that wild feeling

"Then take me Jasper…." I whispered, biting my lip again since it seemed to spur him on.

"Oh I plan to!" he exclaimed and suddenly pushed himself inside me. I could feel him opening me up as he went deeper until he was all the way inside of me and then he stopped moving, kissing me hungrily. He kissed my neck and ran his hands along the sensitive skin on my sides as the discomfort was gradually subsiding, giving way to the familiar ache once again. I pulled my legs up around his hips and started to grind up towards him letting him know I was ok, and he started to pull out almost all the way before pushing back in. he kept doing it finding a slow but steady rhythm and I was crying out with the dizzying pleasure.

He was groaning into my neck and getting a little faster and shallower, and I could feel the tension building in my core coming from deeper inside me this time. He sat up a little and put his strong hands on my hips pulling me towards him with every thrust; the change of angle almost pushed me over the edge…

"God Bella you feel so good, I have daydreamed about getting to fuck this tight little pussy for weeks….so does it live up to those dirty thoughts of yours darlin? You like having a big cock inside you hmm?"

"mmm hmmmm" was all I could manage since he had reached down with one of his hands and started stroking my clit in time with his movements and I could feel myself clenching around him…

"Fuck that's it baby, cum! Cum for me darlin!" he fucked me just that little bit harder and I exploded around him grabbing at the sheets and screaming as he kept thrusting, digging his fingers into my hips again, and then a lot of extra wetness inside as he released into me too.

"Fuuuuuuuuuckkkkk!" I heard him yell through my orgasmic haze and then he was laying on my chest as we both tried to catch our breath. I felt him go soft and slide out of me and he kissed me softly,

"Well how does it feel being broken in by a *real* cowboy?" he tipped an imaginary hat at me and smirked, which started me laughing setting him off as well, I guess with the relief of it all. I regained my composure first and thought about what he said and about all the times I had wondered about him;

"Believe me the reality was much better than the fantasy…." I said with a very satisfied smile.

**Reviews are like having Jasper whisper naughty ideas in your ear so give me some damn it!!!**

**Please! x**


	6. Consequences Or Not

**A/N: Hey everyone - soooooo sorry it has been so long but I had exams at uni and I just couldn't let myself use this as a procrastination tool (as much as I wanted to!) BUT they are over now and I am FREE for the summer so here it is…..consequences eeek! Or is it? Read and find out, and I am trying a new POV this time.**

**I own nothing**

**APOV**

The wind was rushing against my face as I ran with Edward through the forest, and we were laughing as I was beating him for once, until that familiar jolt in my mind stopped me, the world round me fading into something else…..

_Two people, naked on a bed, clearly at the height of their passions, both with very pale skin - the girl a brunette and the man with messy blond hair…._even lost in the depths of my psychic mind I froze in horror at the vision as it melted into a new one……_a wedding, Bella smiling in a beautiful dress hugging Jasper like they were closer than normal, Edward kissing his bride before a flower covered alter………….._

I became aware of the cold night air again, and of Edward's concerned face frowning down at me - I was sitting on the grass and I tried quickly to think of something to keep him out of my head….._oooh Britney!! _I thought and started singing one of her songs in my head as I got to my feet and smiled at Edward.

"Why do I think you're acting weird, Alice?" he asked cautiously.

"Because you worry too much" I giggled, or tried to as those pictures swirled round my mind, wishing I was alone so I could make sense of them, "It was just Rosalie plotting some huge shopping trip to New York - let's go, I smell deer!" I called backwards as I started running again. Edward raised his eyebrow but still he wasn't asking any more questions, thankfully.

___________________________________________________________________

When we got back to the house it was almost dawn and I went straight to my room where I found Jasper lying on the bed watching the news.

"Mornin' sweetie, have a good night?" he asked innocently?

"mmm it was fun - but shouldn't I be asking you the same question?" I snapped, with more accusation in my voice than I meant to have. He recoiled slightly - probably got a truck load of anger from me - and looked wary.

"What do you mean Ali? I've just been layin here waiting for you" he said, his voice soft and reassuring. I flopped down on the bed and tried to hide my face as I felt the tears rising.

"I had a vision. You and Bella. Is it true or were you just thinking it?" I mumbled. I looked up at the beautiful man I had been with for so long and saw guilt in his eyes, which started the tears falling without restraint. For a while….I'm not sure how long…..he just held me until my tears eased off a bit. I pulled away and before I could say anymore he started,

"Alice I…..we….. I just wanted to help her……I guess it got out of control…..it's been killing me having to feel what she feels what with the way Edward treats her like some porcelain doll! I just wanted to make her happy so I could get some peace…..I don't wanna be with her or anything like that - it's you I love Alice. Always and forever and I am so sorry, she just seemed so sad and helpless and I felt so bad for her…….I will do anything to have you forgive me. Please…." he seemed like he couldn't get the words out fast enough and then tailed off at the end and reached out to put his hand on mine, his eyes pleading and I knew he meant every word.

The woman in me wanted to hate him but really I knew I couldn't - he was so kind, so concerned about other people, that's my Jasper and I loved him for it, so I could hardly hold it against him. It wasn't about love, he was just doing the poor girl a favour, and he had never looked at anyone else in 80 odd years which I knew was a lot to ask of such a highly sexed guy. I moved my fingers around so I was holding his hand properly and thought about the second vision and what it must mean. That Edward and Bella were going to be happy, to be married…..was it _because _of what she and Jasper had done? Was that what it was trying to show me…?

"Jasper, I believe you I just wish you had trusted that you could tell me about stuff like that. Like….before they happen since you say you have nothing to hide. And I don't think you do, I know what state she has been in….I was this close to trying to help her myself" I smiled shyly

"Well I would love to have been around for that one." he winked and I slapped his arm playfully.

"You know I had another vision…..of Bella and Edward getting married" I ventured to see what he would say.

"Really? So what they are gonna be ok?" he looked hopeful and I shrugged

"I guess so but I don't know what it means for right now, apart from that you must have helped them. I'll talk to Bella about it all later today, make sure she knows that I know and everything is fine, or you can if you want to…..but what about Edward? This vision, I don't know….you think maybe we should tell him?" Jasper never answered me but his head snapped towards the doorway and I followed it to see Edward standing there, wild eyed and gripping the doorknob.

"Tell me what, Alice?" He said quietly, but something in his face made me feel like he already knew…. and from the way he squeezed my hand, I think Jazz felt it too.

**JPOV**

I felt the rage, hurt, disgust and a million other things from Edward as he stared at me - the guy who fucked his girlfriend - but all the time they were fading. He looked away from me to Alice and I knew she was letting him into her head…..making everything bad seem for the best and everything good to be better than anything else, like she always did. I threw him some calm for good measure and I trusted my brilliant, understanding wife to make it all ok.

I thought about the vision she mentioned - they were going to be perfect and my Ali had forgiven me. Bella would take some power back now and they could finally get closer, like I had wanted. Although I can't deny it was a damn good fuck, I meant it when I told Alice I loved only her….it would never be like it is with her with anyone else. And I can feel how strongly Bella feels the same. I smiled to myself thinking how embarrassed she would be if Alice bounded in and told her "the good news" and vowed to talk to her about all this myself.

I realised while Edward was sifting through Alice's mind, that Bella and I would be closer now too and I was actually pleased about that, maybe someday we could even laugh about what happened, and I noticed the anxiety I had felt had lifted. Yes I liked her a lot more now that I knew what was going on with her - in the next room I felt nothing. Bella was sound asleep, dreaming of Edward no doubt and here was me holding Alice's hand as she calmed his worrying….the way it always would be.

"Come sit down, Edward" I said with an apologetic smile "I'm sure you know we have quite a story to tell you…"

"But don't worry" Alice interrupted me excitedly, "It has a REALLY happy ending"

**Please review it is what makes me wanna write more - and I love them like I love Jackson…..in other words A FREAKIN LOT!! 3**


	7. Reclaim What Is Mine

**A/N: ok so I had a last minute change of heart and figured no way could I let this go just yet so I have decided to give it a second strength - who knows where we will end up? If you are one of the fans of this fic though I hope you will come with me on my journey of random inspiration! We are trying yet another new POV and then back with Bella for now and there might just be a lemon in here somewhere! P.S. I know you are dying for hot Jasper to come back and talk to you but you will have to be patient for now……**

**I own nothing.**

**EPOV**

I couldn't settle on which was worse - the fact that he had put his hands, amongst other things, on her pure white skin and taken her innocence; or the equally undeniable truth that I practically drove them to it.

I had seen and heard it now from both Alice and Jasper, their bond as strong and intact as ever while my love slept next door, oblivious to the drama she was starring in. Alice showed me it all….the act, the wedding…..explained their connection, excitedly convincing me of how this twist in our lives had somehow sealed our happiness in time. I was clever enough to work out that this meant Bella and I were almost definitely not going to work out if things had stayed as they were. I felt….guilty, as illogical as that seems considering I was not the one who cheated but still couldn't help dwelling on the idea that it could have been me if I had been strong enough.

I had been pondering this all night as I watched over Bella, my beautiful Bella, while she slept on. I had been trying to keep us both safe but I had been breaking us down, was what I had been informed. I simply wanted her virtue, and her blood, to remain untouched but my determined, always surprising Bella had other ideas. She was right of course to want us to become more physical - we were both legally allowed (I perhaps slightly more so), we had been together more than just a fleeting time and we had plans to stay together for as long as possible….I just could not get my head around it in time.

_Damn stubborn mind…..always so cautious….and now he has known what it is like to be with her and you haven't!! _I berated myself angrily.

Through the seething anger I could feel some other part of my vast vampire mind latching onto something…..something hopeful….._maybe that overly horny bastard has helped after all….._

_If he has been with her, and he is the one with the supposed lack of self control, then surely I who has vowed to love her and protect her, and would rather die than cause her pain……surely I can manage not to hurt her either…….I could certainly try for her sake now that I have no excuse to deny her…..and with Alice's vision I feel I must try for our sake….._

I looked down at her slim body tangled in the covers - it certainly didn't seem broken or sucked dry - but instead was a vision of creamy perfection in the moonlight as always. It was like I saw her in a new light, never mind moonlight, like she was no longer a beautiful masterpiece to be admired for afar and taken great care with…but a beautiful woman to be simply taken and admired from as close as I could get. The 17 year old boy in me was almost winning so I obeyed his subconscious instruction and reached out to stroke her hair out of her face….

"mmmm….Edward" she mumbled in her dreams, but to me it was not only clearly audible but also the final straw in my epiphany.

She wanted me even in her sleep. Even after she had been with him. And I most certainly still wanted her…..her scent as she shuffled around was arousing me already. I leaned down to kiss her just under the ear, trying to gently wake her with my intentions - she may have technically *done it* now but I was going to show her what it could be…..

_erase all thought of him and make her mine _I growled inwardly as she began to stir.

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**BPOV**

Something was breaking through my sleep and coaxing me to the surface….something touching my face and neck but it wasn't irritating me. It felt nice. I reluctantly opened my eyes from my dreams of Edward but still he was there, although in reality he looked different - intense and determined like there was fire behind his golden eyes.

"Hey," I said sleepily and started to feel uneasy when his expression didn't shift "What's wrong?"

"I was just thinking that perhaps I ought to remind you how strongly I feel for you. Remind you that you are all mine. What do you think…?" he asked his voice soft and dangerous

"Of course I am all yours silly!" I tried to say but he cut me off by catching my mouth with his, his cool hand pressed to my back with a passion he didn't usually allow himself. I could feel myself falling into the oblivion of his intoxicating scent and his cool lips against my warm ones, and knew he would break away in a second as he always did, even though I wanted him to keep going so badly. Then my brain got back in touch with my body and I realised he wasn't stopping, he was shifting us so he was lying down beside me on his side and running his hand around from my back, over my waist and hip and down my thigh. This was definitely new!

His long, cold fingers were raising all the teeny hairs in their wake as they grazed over my sleep-heated skin and the shivers were starting up that ache between my legs. Still he kissed me like he hadn't seen me in months and I couldn't decide how to feel - if I should worry that he might pull back any second or if I should give in to how much I was enjoying this. His hand reached my knee and changed course to start inching up the front of my leg towards my growing desire and any worry I was holding on to melted away.

His hand met the cloth of my pyjama shorts and he stilled his lips and opened his eyes to look dazzlingly into my own with a wicked smile,

"I love you Bella. I disappoint you in this bed so often and I cannot bear to do it any longer - I don't have the strength to stay away from you," he whispered, echoing what he said to me in the restaurant all those months ago, and then kissed me again.

His right hand which had been still as he spoke twitched back to life and I remembered where it was….and where it seemed to be going! He was so teasingly slow as he edged his fingers along my waistband I had to stop myself from begging but then he began to slip his hand inside the loose cotton and I unconsciously opened my legs further for him. He brushed his icy middle finger over my hot clit and I moaned into his mouth causing him to stop and slide small circles around it. I could only think of how insanely good he was despite his inexperience as I could feel my orgasm building itself already.

"Oh my god," I managed to say between gasping breaths "please don't stop!"

"Oh I won't be stopping til you're screaming my name…." he said in the sexiest voice I ever heard him use all the time teasing my clit faster and faster and something just clicked inside me and out of nowhere I came for him,

"Edward!" I moaned so loud I thought everyone must have heard - although if I was in my right mind I would have realised they probably heard the entire conversation - as I throbbed and shuddered in his arms.

Before I could recover he was taking our clothes off and when I caught on to what he was doing I eagerly helped…..until he was naked when I stopped and just stared awestruck at his perfect marble form in the moonlight. I thought fleetingly of Jasper, leaner and completely different whilst being the same creature

_My big strong man…_I thought as I watched the muscles moving in his delicious arms as he roughly pulled my panties slightly nervously down and off my legs _Oh God I am finally going to make love to him……_

He crawled like a tiger up my body and spread my legs with his hips never breaking the silent tension and his eyes black with lust, the wicked smile still in place. He held his weight on one arm and reached down to stroke his finger along my sensitive entrance and I inhaled sharply thrusting myself onto his hand

"Do you want me inside you Bella? Say it." he said softly but firmly "I want you to beg for it. Tell me you're mine"

"I'm yours Edward, please….I want you now. I need it" I breathed as he stroked me.

And then my mind was blank as he sheathed himself inside me and groaned. We lay still for a second and then it was as if we opened our eyes to look at each other at the same time. He looked a little unsure so I reached up and kissed him to tell him it was ok and he started to move making me mewl and moan with every thrust. My head was spinning as he was hitting every nerve just right like he was made for my body, to give me pleasure. I could tell he was brushing my clit with his pelvis without even trying and I could feel myself falling into the bed, falling into the sensations of what he was doing

"Bella I want you to come for me….now" he growled and right on cue I felt myself tensing around him and moved my hips with him to push myself over the edge

"AAAAHhhhhhhhh" I came harder than I thought possible, my body gripping and clenching at his hardness and felt his cooling liquid running out of me seconds later as he growled into my neck, one hand digging into my thigh.

He eventually pulled out of me and wrapped me in the duvet so he wouldn't make me too cold and we just lay there in our bliss for a bit. Suddenly I found myself speaking

"Where did all this come from?" as I turned my head to look up at him and his face was pained as though he didn't want to say what was on his lips. He caught my eye and smiled, pushing some hair out of my face

"I wanted you - no us - to feel the pleasure I knew we could give each other. I wanted to make you feel so good you would never want anyone else but me to touch you. And I think you liked it" He said more confidently then he usually seemed. I nlooked questioningly back at him with a half smile

"Look don't freak out but I know everything." he said and waited for me to react

"I…but…when…it's….God……" I stammered and scrambled for something anything to say to fix it but he just looked at me with so much fierce possessiveness and love and was that…pride? _He's proud of himself for his skill and so he should be _I purred inwardly and I knew it wasn't the right time to talk it all out so I settled for the one part of what I needed to say that he wanted to hear

"Looks like you succeeded in your task then doesn't it….although maybe you should just make sure I got the message…." I tried to sound seductive and twisted my hands in his - now rather messy - hair…………

**Reviews are like being taught a lesson by Edward…..or Jasper to be honest! x**


	8. The Dream

**A/N: Thanks to those of you who are still with me…..worried I may have lost some of you but I am pleased when any single one of you appreciates my work!**

**So this is short but very (lemony) sweet and even though it is necessary for the plot I GUARANTEE you will love it…..! :D**

**BPOV**

Something was off. I knew it. That night with Edward I thought everything was going to be perfect…like a storybook ending - a Happily Ever After. Not in my lifetime I guess. We hadn't been _together _like that since and it had been almost a month. He kept saying he didn't know what came over him and apologizing for it coming out of the blue; telling me it was much safer if we took it slow for a while because I could so easily have been killed, and was just lucky not to have been and blah blah blah. I tried to change his mind yet was resigned to the fact that I couldn't. I think it was because I had some bruises afterward but one - I never suffered for them at the time, and two - he is a vampire and I'm not…_.Jasper never bruised you so it must be possible _I thought irritatingly to myself as Edward kissed me goodnight. To be fair he was much more passionate than _before_ but his boundaries were well and truly back up.

"Sweet dreams love" he whispered before vanishing out the window to hunt with Alice. I smiled half heartedly after him and tried to get more comfortable. Hopefully soon I would be asleep and my dream would come again. See the voice in my head while annoying, had a point and The Dream was my guilty pleasure these days…..it is almost certainly what's stopping me losing it with Edward and his rules. The first night I had the dream I was shocked because it was only a day since me and Edward made love and I tried not to think about it, but soon it was recurring and now if I made sure to think of it before falling asleep I could make it happen every night and then I could feel free.

So I did.

_I'm riding a horse through dry heat and dusty farmland, enjoying the sun on my back and the feel of her strong muscles rippling under me. We are going slow just wasting the day and then I see him in the distance leaning on a fence near the barn. He whistles at me as we get nearer and I blush smiling at him from under my lashes. He takes hold of my horse by the reins at her head and leads her into the barn_

"_Well I don't think I ever saw anyone make that look so good, darlin" he drawls at me with a devastating half-smile, "but I bet you'd look even better ridin me instead…."_

_I feign shock and try to look appalled when we both know his words have made me ache for him already. He takes me by the waist as he helps me down from the saddle and brushes himself too close to my back, letting me feel how hard he is. He sweeps my hair away and kisses where my neck meets my shoulder, making me shiver and my nipples harden. He turns me almost roughly around and pulls me down on top of him on the piles of hay. We don't speak we know what we want and his hands are all over me quickly, rolling me over and stripping me of what little clothes I have on and I undo his shirt and his belt; needing him desperately._

_He reaches down and touches me confidently, no hesitation and I arch into his hand moaning at the sudden contact with my most sensitive place_

"_Damn you are soaked already….someone is a very dirty little girl aren't they Bella" he says the last part into my ear in a voice so silkily seductive I get impossibly wetter and can only whimper "Mmhmm" back. He removes his hand and replaces it with his hard dick seconds later making me cry out in pain and pleasure grabbing at his honey blonde hair with desire. _

_He takes me just how he wants me, moving me on top and grabbing my hips to guide me while I ride him like he said I should. Then he groans and gets himself on top again to fuck me hard and fast making me scream for him I come so good…..and so does he. _

_We dress quickly after we are done and as he goes to leave he turns round to tip his cowboy hat at me, winking and clicking his tongue_

"_Hope to see you coming for a ride again real soon, Darlin…." he calls over his shoulder as he leads my oblivious horse back to her stable………………………………_

I wake hot and wet and right on the edge, my hand barely having to try to push me over it in my semi-alert state, and then I fall into deep dreamless slumber; fulfilled by him for another day.

**Reviews are like being ravished by Bella's dream lover….whoever he is :P**


	9. To Help Or Not To Help

**A/N: Thanks to everyone who is still with me - I have reached a turning point in this story and some of you might not like where I take it, BUT I have a funny feeling that my loyal lemonade drinkers will be rather pleased….**

**HEHEEE thanks millions to my shiny new Beta, NCChris - she is AWESOME and I owe this new direction to her.**

**P.S. If you still haven't, please check out my one-shot outtake, Summer with the Stable Boy. I entered it in the "For the Love of Jasper" contest and you'll have to be voting soon! It's cowboy Jazz at his citrus best so I hope you like!**

**JPOV**

I was tormented. Perhaps that was melodramatic, but I didn't know how else to put it. I felt pressure from all sides, different kinds, and I seriously wondered how much more of this drama I could take. All of us caught up with this little _thing _between Bella and I were in emotional turmoil and nobody could tell but me. To the world they - and I - were stoic, graceful, unconcerned with trivial things, calm. Average vampires (if you can say that without being ironic). However, under the surface? They were a mess and I was overwhelmed with the barrage of everyone's shit.

We all knew Bella and Edward had overcome their issues one night not long after we told Edward. We couldn't fail to know, what with Emmett and his crass humour on the matter, which went on for a week until it became apparent to our sensitive ears that it was a one-off performance. Even Esme and Carlisle seemed quietly concerned with the tension, but seemed to trust us to sort things amongst ourselves.

We were not doing well.

Bella was by day frustrated to the point of exasperation, and by night back in lust with me and God, she knew how to churn that stuff out in hot, horny waves. Alice was unfathomable in her erratic but repeating pattern; insecurity, anger, determination, triumph, desire, shame, defeat. And Edward was….Edward. A Self-perpetuating tortured soul only magnified by 100 in this situation. He was wracked by guilt, fear, disgust, and jealousy; all the while fighting with his self-righteous stubbornness. I didn't, couldn't, know how I felt through the stack of feelings I was piled under. A little of the same things as them all…. and some other stuff I honestly was reluctant to examine.

I think I might have to, though, because this drama just wasn'tme. It made me feel ill if I could really feel illness anymore and I just wanted to….rest from it. Thing is not everything I felt was unpleasant. After dark when I would hear Bella thrashing around in her bedcovers, moaning unintelligible things and throwing off pulses of pure sex, I couldn't stop myself from getting hard and listening harder. My crystal clear memory of that night wasn't exactly painful to recall and I found that I did so without even trying. After she, and I, would calm down, I would get angry that the beautiful, sweet, sexy girl next door was STILL not having her needs met. My angry lust was being projected onto Alice and she didn't complain, although I had the feeling my intuitive little girl knew what was going on. I was just so stuffed full of this thick emotional climate I couldn't get a handle on anything.

"Oh my God, how you can you stand all this?!" she glared at me threw up her dainty hands.

I was slow to catch up, I was so lost in thought I didn't know Alice had come into our room. But she, as usual, had tapped into my musing for me.

"I know baby it is drowning me. I feel like I have a tower of things to carry and I can't carry another thing," I sighed, dropping my head.

She rubbed my neck and kissed my hair. I felt calmer, though she had no gift to that end; my Alice would get us through this. I looked back up and she was smiling grimly. I knew that face; it was a woman planning to meddle, who hadn't found a way in, and I wasn't sure what I thought about that, considering how delicate and close to home this was. I knew it was easier and wiser not to go against Alice. She hadn't had any more visions about it or she would have told me, but as I looked at her determined face I sort of knew _something _was coming.

"We have to help her, Jas, but I don't know how, y'know?" she frowned and looked at her nails. "I feel so bad for her. We have each other and it's like she has nobody. She won't even talk to me about it now either. I _hate _Edward for this!"

"She still feels like you must be angry at her. When you talk to her she feels so awful and worries. You're right she is alone in this - Edward seems to think she can accept going back to strained chastity as easy as he can, so he suffers in silence and she just has to do the same," I said as I took her hand. "I can feel all her pain and I swear sometimes if I could cry for her I would. She has been avoiding me though so I don't know either - maybe she wants to be left alone."

"Oh that's not it," She giggled. "She has dreams about you - I heard her say your name in her sleep when you were hunting. I checked in on her and it was pretty obvious what she was dreaming! It was quite sexy!"

I think my face must have been pained at these revelations, because her face fell again as she remembered how we got on to that subject.

"I know, I know!" she snapped, "I just want them to be happy."

She gripped my hand suddenly and then she was lost, faraway in a vision. I stroked her wrist as she gazed through me into some new potential future. I thought about all she had said and wondered, perhaps vaguely hoped, that she could see a way out through the fog of her kind, glazed eyes. I didn't have to wait long.

She gasped and jolted back to today. Her expression was…unreadable. and she was giving off a flurry of new things, excitement, anxiety, doubt, hope. Could she really have solved it just like that?

"Alice, baby?" I asked encouragingly, "What did you see?"

She looked me in the eyes and took a deep pointless breath.

"I saw the answer. But I have no idea if any of you will think it's the right one."

She twisted her mouth pondering.

"Tell me and I will help you, and Bella. Whatever it takes," I said.

She looked deep in my eyes, "Anything…..?" she ventured.

**OOOOOH sorry for the cliffy! I just had to! Review me please and maybe prizes if you can guess what she saw…..! x**


	10. A Fork In The Road

**A/N: Ok so I am still very busy BUT there was an epiphany and a night of procrastination and I just HAD to know what you thought so here is your new chapter 2 weeks early! Please DO NOT flame me for my "slight" deviation from the norm....I wanna be different while still getting where I need to be PLUS this was desperate for a shake up so (hopefully) enjoy!!**

**Xxxx**

**APOV**

In that moment – only seconds for him – my spacious vampire mind was teeming. I had an inkling that this might have been the truth in what I saw in my first visions in the woods but now it had been confirmed and I was.....unsure. Certainly I knew things were going to change after that night and the happiness at the wedding in my mind was overwhelming, life had been this way for so long. Jasper and I had been through a lot and we loved each other dearly but creatures as timeless as us are not necessarily unmovable. We came together unquestioningly through one of my visions and found peace and hope and security with the Cullens together; but I always knew somehow that while he was my other half, he was not my soulmate. I had never hidden this from him as it wasn't fair but he was as happy as I was to be saved and belong somewhere; so we had done nothing but enjoy our time together as best friends and lovers but finally, with arrival of Jasper's true love, it looked like my visions had adjusted and found this new destiny for us. I didn't know what to make of the future I was undeniably facing. My future with Edward.

**JPOV**

She looked thoughtful for a minute and then took another steadying but pointless breath before smiling wistfully at me.

"Jasper honey, you know that when you found me I explained that we were to be together then and be with the Cullens; but that you were meant, at some time in enternity, to find your real soulmate?" she asked gently.

She knew I had only partly believed this, and hoped maybe that fate would shift because we were happy, making us "real" soulmates. I nodded warily, the back of my mind knowing what was looming but not wanting to feel it. At least, not knowing how to feel about it.

"Well," She began as if not knowing how to word it. "She is here and the best thing we can do is to be honest about that. People shouldn't be kept from their path, if you love them."

Her voice cracked and I knew if this was a hman "break up" she would be crying now.

"I love you Jasper, and Bella and Edward and you love them too. We have to accept that this path has settled for us now and we have to trust that it is the right one, considering the happy ending I have been shown." She was rambling wisely as I tried to process it all.

I nodded slowly and looked at our joined hands. My best friend, my sometimes lover, my rock, my savior. When I first saw her I had thought she was beautiful, and she knew me and wanted to take me somewhere lovely so I simply followed and I always did. I had never even thought to question it but it wasn't exactly romance of the century when you thought about it's origins. I knew I would do anything for her though and so I would do this because although we weren't winning any prizes for passion, she loved the god-awful mess that was me, dearly and I her.

_Bella is meant for me _I pondered, trying out the words.

The perfect creature I had watched, lusted for, thought about, been intrigued by and tried to make mine for one night, was mine for all other nights. It was "real". But then I was filled with concern.

"What about Edward?" I voiced almost by mistake.

"Edward might be difficult but he has his own destiny to find. He had a bride in my wedding vision silly," she said softly and I swear she looked embarrassed.

"You?" I asked incredulously. "You and Eddy boy? Damn he is in for trouble….you will eat him alive darlin!"

She shoved me playfully but I knew it was the first warm tendrils of acceptance swirling around us. I guessed it made sense with us coming to the Cullens and then Bella joining the family.

"Hey....that is not funny! I'm still trying to get my head around it, I mean, what am I going to say? 'Hey Edward I just figured out that we are meant to be together really so what do you say'?" she looked mystified by it.

"Just show him the vision in glorious technicolour?" I suggested.

I was thinking about Bella's reaction and worrying just as much – she could be so stubborn.

"I guess I just have to try but if only we could ease them into this weirdness gently - make it seem more like the solution than a complication" she sighed.

"Y'know there is one area where we know they need a solution..." I smirked as flashes of a frustrated, writhing Bella flitted through my brain.

**Review please and be kind ******


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